Adoption

While I have not had infertility problems, knock on wood, I have had several family members and close friends struggle with this painful trial. They are good people. They love the Lord. They love each other. They have sufficient financial means. They have beautiful homes that are just waiting for little feet to bless their floors with their pitter-patter. They ache when they see babies. They cry for babies. They think of little else (especially the mother – I say Mother because all women are mothers whether they have born children or not. Eve was the “mother of all living” before she bore any children. Women are mothers inherently.).

I adamantly support single mothers to lovingly place their baby in the arms of one of the many families I have mentioned above. Think of the alternative: poverty, no father, daycare from someone other than mom, (Grandma is not the same as mom!), mom still in the dating scene, instability, etc. Statistics and Facts on Adoption

Two nights ago I met with one of my good friends from high school. She informed me that her sister, of which I really enjoyed as a friend and person in high school, had a one year old son.

“I didn’t know she was married!” I exclaimed.

“She’s not.”

She then explained to me that the sister messed up, but was keeping the baby. That is what made my stomach fall.

These people who encouraged her to raise the child in a single parent home should know better; they claim to be good members of the church. Raising a child with a husband who supports the family well and a mom who stays home with the kids is hard enough, but when you add in the difficulties of a single mom, by choice, raising a child becomes almost impossible. The sister could have transformed a bad choice into a better outcome. She could have lovingly and selflessly placed that innocent baby in the arms of a couple who was not ashamed of having a baby or even worried, but yearning to have a child in their arms. Yearning to love and give the baby every opportunity in the world.

Here is the bottom line. In The Family: A Proclamation to the World it states, “Children are entitled ….to be reared by a father and a mother”. This means that it is the child’s right to have both parents. It is not the birth mother’s choice. It is what the child needs and deserves. It is what God commands. I had to cringe when my friend said in a matter-of-fact way, “My sister is 27 she ought to be able to handle it.”

Adoption is not about “handling it”. It is about the baby and the best life he could have. It is about love. It is about making a child whole by giving them a family and then going on your way and making the best of yourself. It will hurt. I don’t doubt that. There is a bond built when you grow a baby in your womb, but keeping the baby is thinking of yourself. Think of it this way, birth mothers have the unique opportunity to give birth twice. The first birth is literal. The second birth is the birth of opportunity and security. Sharing that baby, with a family, is selfless and gives the baby life once again.