Pages 53 -59
This section talks about not punishing accidents or ignorance, but another thing I was reminded of is to control ones emotions when accidents occur. I read in another book this week that a mother and homemaker ought to demonstrate imperturbability. The dictionary says that imperturbability is an adjective that means "incapable of being upset or agitated; not easily excited; calm".
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Harshness
"There is so much harshness in the world. Don't let your children hear any of it from you. It is all right to turn them on end for a spanking now and then, but don't be harsh with them." Harold B. Lee
Monday, January 22, 2007
Mother at Home - Discussion
The Mother at Home pages 40-53.
Staying true to the first part of the book, obedience is still the theme of this passage. We are instructed in this section to watch the disposition of the child and to punish accordingly; never let disobedience go unchecked, but watch the precious child to see what form of punishment would be most appropriate. A quote that really stuck out to me was, “The disposition of a child is of too delicate of a texture to be handled with a rough and careless grasp.” These are our dear children and we are to enforce the law, but to do so judiciously. (I have noticed several times the word judiciously being used and I think it is so appropriate!)
I think I'm going to try to find a hard copy of this book!
Staying true to the first part of the book, obedience is still the theme of this passage. We are instructed in this section to watch the disposition of the child and to punish accordingly; never let disobedience go unchecked, but watch the precious child to see what form of punishment would be most appropriate. A quote that really stuck out to me was, “The disposition of a child is of too delicate of a texture to be handled with a rough and careless grasp.” These are our dear children and we are to enforce the law, but to do so judiciously. (I have noticed several times the word judiciously being used and I think it is so appropriate!)
I think I'm going to try to find a hard copy of this book!
Sunday, January 21, 2007
Vacation
We've been at Grandma and Grandpa's due to my sister-in-laws baby shower. It has been fun, but my kids always stay up too late, eat too many sweets, and wake up too early. We are going back home tomorrow. It is a 3 1/2 hour drive which is wonderful compared to the 10 1/2 hour drive it used to be. (We moved about 5 months ago.) Hubby has work to do in this end of the state so he will work a little tomorrow and we will paly.
Saturday, January 20, 2007
To Train Up A Child - Book Review
To Train up a Child by Michael and Debi Pearl - Book Review
This is a bit long, but I think it is an important subject. Originally, I had posted each section separately, but I have since combined them for continuity. If you are pressed for time, go ahead and read each section individually.
The biggest lesson I have learned is this: Do not judge something until you have heard both sides of the story. To do this, one must research. To research correctly one must go to a reputable sourc. You cannot get the entire truth if your source is an enemy of the subject and if the source has conflicting interests.
I have several areas where this is applicable and I will explain.
1. Child Rearing
2. People
3. Religion
I have to admit that I was a part of the “No Spanking” club when I first had children. Then I moved to the “No Spanking, Except on Very Rare Occasions”. I thought spanking was mean. Oh, how my ignorance must have shown to those who properly used the switch! (Not to the “No Spankers” because they wanted to believe all I had stated.)
All the child rearing things I had learned were from my own parents and also from pop psychology child discipline books. I never bothered to even learn about the other side and its techniques.
My eyes were opened when I read, To Train Up a Child. The parenting in this book is not mean, but filled with compassion and composure. This is a book that methodically explains how to rear children with love, patience, self-control, and happiness and to be a happy family. The people who correctly use the switch do not do it in anger, and as a matter of fact, they explicitly explain to NEVER DISCIPLINE IN ANGER. (How many people who don’t spank can say they don’t discipline in anger.)
So where do I now stand on the spectrum? The jury is still out. I’m still not using the switch, but I’m trying to enforce complete obedience and having a negative consequence as a result of disobedience.
Now that I have the whole story, I believe that parenting and discipline is an individual thing. No one has the right to judge if it is too harsh or too lax. Each family must anwer to God about how they raise their children and so each family must pray to God for guidance. Whether you use “time-outs” or the switch, self-control is to be demonstrated and no punishment should take place until it is. How will your children learn self-control if you can’t even demonstrate it?
I could speak for hours about this book. I won’t. Every parent could benefit from reading this book even if you choose other forms of discipline because it is not just a book about discipline. It may not change the way you do things in your home, but it will change the way you perceive things.
If you want to learn about certain parenting techniques and one side paints the opposing side negatively, I suggest you research both sides and then you can make an educated conclusion. I also feel the same about people.
2. People
This is simple and I’m sure we have all experienced this. If we want to know why someone did something or anything about someone, we need to go to that person. If we ask someone else we may not get the whole story. Even worse, we may get half-truths and end up with false ideas of the person. If you read my blog you will see that I memorize different quotes and scriptures. I recently memorized one from Shakespeare.
“Good name in man and women is the immediate jewel of their souls.
Who steals my purse steals trash.
But he that filches from me my good name robs me of that which not enriches him
And makes me poor indeed.”
How precious is our name! How easily is it robbed! Do not do this unfairness. Go to the source. Do not get information from others – especially those who may be that person’s enemy – you will not get the truth and your conclusions will be incorrect.
3. Religion
I love religion. It is what has made me who I am. I have read books that have taught me about different religions. I have learned about Jews, Buddhists and Hindus as well as certain Christian faiths. Learning about other beliefs has strenthened my personal views. I read books written by people of that particular religion. It would not be fair to read a Christian book written by a Buddhist who thought Christianity was a bunch of bunk. I would not get the complete story. It would not be fair to ask a Rabi to teach me all he knows about Catholicism. Let members of each group teach you and then come to your own educated conclusion.
You may become a better follower of Christ by learning and understanding, with compassion, the beliefs of other religions. An often misunderstood religion and the victim of slander is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. This is a church that has several million members and is often misrepresented by other religions. Many people are curious about this religion because the members believe in the same church as it was organized in the Bible. See Scripture References. For more info go here. For more info on any other subject or religion, go to their home page. Be fair and get the correct story.
All I'm asking is that when we fix our opinions about a subject, person, or religion just make sure you recieved all the information. Do not go to a third party as a resource. Education is the pathway to compassion and understanding.
Thanks for reading!
This is a bit long, but I think it is an important subject. Originally, I had posted each section separately, but I have since combined them for continuity. If you are pressed for time, go ahead and read each section individually.
The biggest lesson I have learned is this: Do not judge something until you have heard both sides of the story. To do this, one must research. To research correctly one must go to a reputable sourc. You cannot get the entire truth if your source is an enemy of the subject and if the source has conflicting interests.
I have several areas where this is applicable and I will explain.
1. Child Rearing
2. People
3. Religion
I have to admit that I was a part of the “No Spanking” club when I first had children. Then I moved to the “No Spanking, Except on Very Rare Occasions”. I thought spanking was mean. Oh, how my ignorance must have shown to those who properly used the switch! (Not to the “No Spankers” because they wanted to believe all I had stated.)
All the child rearing things I had learned were from my own parents and also from pop psychology child discipline books. I never bothered to even learn about the other side and its techniques.
My eyes were opened when I read, To Train Up a Child. The parenting in this book is not mean, but filled with compassion and composure. This is a book that methodically explains how to rear children with love, patience, self-control, and happiness and to be a happy family. The people who correctly use the switch do not do it in anger, and as a matter of fact, they explicitly explain to NEVER DISCIPLINE IN ANGER. (How many people who don’t spank can say they don’t discipline in anger.)
So where do I now stand on the spectrum? The jury is still out. I’m still not using the switch, but I’m trying to enforce complete obedience and having a negative consequence as a result of disobedience.
Now that I have the whole story, I believe that parenting and discipline is an individual thing. No one has the right to judge if it is too harsh or too lax. Each family must anwer to God about how they raise their children and so each family must pray to God for guidance. Whether you use “time-outs” or the switch, self-control is to be demonstrated and no punishment should take place until it is. How will your children learn self-control if you can’t even demonstrate it?
I could speak for hours about this book. I won’t. Every parent could benefit from reading this book even if you choose other forms of discipline because it is not just a book about discipline. It may not change the way you do things in your home, but it will change the way you perceive things.
If you want to learn about certain parenting techniques and one side paints the opposing side negatively, I suggest you research both sides and then you can make an educated conclusion. I also feel the same about people.
2. People
This is simple and I’m sure we have all experienced this. If we want to know why someone did something or anything about someone, we need to go to that person. If we ask someone else we may not get the whole story. Even worse, we may get half-truths and end up with false ideas of the person. If you read my blog you will see that I memorize different quotes and scriptures. I recently memorized one from Shakespeare.
“Good name in man and women is the immediate jewel of their souls.
Who steals my purse steals trash.
But he that filches from me my good name robs me of that which not enriches him
And makes me poor indeed.”
How precious is our name! How easily is it robbed! Do not do this unfairness. Go to the source. Do not get information from others – especially those who may be that person’s enemy – you will not get the truth and your conclusions will be incorrect.
3. Religion
I love religion. It is what has made me who I am. I have read books that have taught me about different religions. I have learned about Jews, Buddhists and Hindus as well as certain Christian faiths. Learning about other beliefs has strenthened my personal views. I read books written by people of that particular religion. It would not be fair to read a Christian book written by a Buddhist who thought Christianity was a bunch of bunk. I would not get the complete story. It would not be fair to ask a Rabi to teach me all he knows about Catholicism. Let members of each group teach you and then come to your own educated conclusion.
You may become a better follower of Christ by learning and understanding, with compassion, the beliefs of other religions. An often misunderstood religion and the victim of slander is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. This is a church that has several million members and is often misrepresented by other religions. Many people are curious about this religion because the members believe in the same church as it was organized in the Bible. See Scripture References. For more info go here. For more info on any other subject or religion, go to their home page. Be fair and get the correct story.
All I'm asking is that when we fix our opinions about a subject, person, or religion just make sure you recieved all the information. Do not go to a third party as a resource. Education is the pathway to compassion and understanding.
Thanks for reading!
Friday, January 19, 2007
And There Was Light book review
And There Was Light – Book Review
First I want to open with the description Gordon B. Hinkley gave of this book,
“
“The world of violins and flutes, f horns and cello, of fugues, scherzos and gavottes, obeyed laws which, were so beautiful and so clear that all music seemed to speak of God. My body was not listening, it was praying. My spirit no longer had bounds, and if tears came to my eyes, I did not feel them running down because they were outside me. I wept with gratitude every time the orchestra began to sing. A world of sounds for a blind man, what sudden grace!”
D&C 25
“For a blind person music is nourishment, as beauty is for those who see. He needs to receive it, to have it administered at intervals like food. Otherwise a void is created inside him and causes him pain.”
We need to seek beauty and cleanliness.
“My God, give me the strength to keep my promises. Since I made them in a good cause, they are yours to keep as well as mine. Now that twenty young men – tomorrow there may be a hundred – are waiting for my orders, tell me what orders to give them. By myself I know how to do almost nothing, but if you will it I am capable of almost everything. Most of all give me prudence. Your enthusiasm I no longer need, for I am filled with it.”
Prayer to God as the Resistance started.
“An unaccustomed radiance filled my head, and my heart stopped beating out of rhythm. All at once I began to understand everything I had been seeking and not finding for the past weeks. As to my own conscience, it no longer troubled me. I had dedicated it to a cause which must have the power of truth since it was teaching me to speak all those words I had never uttered before.”
Scripture – good filled with light and bad cut off dark
If you want to be ordinary and nothing to shout about then sit on the fence. My choir teacher told us to not be timid as we would sing. If you are going to make a mistake, make it a good one, but sing with your heart and be confident. Great men and women pick a side of the fence and they are bold and courageous about their beliefs.
When two of the most courageous leaders of the French Resistance were asked what fault they found hardest to bear in other people. They both immediately answered, “Dullness.” Dullness and mediocrity is not what leaders are made of. One of them went on to say, “If some character says yes to me to be obliging and just to be let alone, I want to hit him.” Jacques Lusseyran, explained further, “Society was divided into two parts, the Hard and the Soft. It was not cowards one found among the soft ones, and certainly not traitors, for traitors were almost always the hard ones who had gone wrong, but the formless race of the procrastinators, and all the ones who approved of what we were doing and were careful not to be involved in it.”
Revelation 3:15-16 (KJV) says, “I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot. So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth. We need to chose now where we stand and we then need to stand for what we believe in courageously and boldly.
“Fear kills and joy maintains life.” Jacques hit a turning point in the Nazis prison camp. He began helping others and he said that was how he lived and survived.
Jacques said, “We had to live in the present; each moment had to absorbed for all that was in it, to satisfy the hunger for life. Take away from suffering its double drumbeat of resonance, memory and fear. Suffering may persist, but already it is relieved by half. When a ray of sunshine comes, open up; absorb it to the depths of your being. Never think that an hour earlier you were cold and that an hour later you will be cold again. Throw yourself into each moment as if it were the only one that really existed. Just enjoy.” Oh, that we could do this daily. That we could take a good thing and not diminish its goodness by remembering something bad.
This was not just a book about a man who played a key role in resisting the Nazis’ terrors and his imprisonment, but it is also a book about the life of a blind hero and a book about friendship. Jacques said, “Friendship was salvation, in this fragile world the only thing left that was not fragile. I promise you one can be drunk on friendship as well as on love.” I’m amazed at all the friends that Jacques found along his path in life. It is my belief that he was so gregarious because he lived with fervor and that people are attracted to this. He often was in the middle of things, organizing, helping, and living. He was constantly thinking, learning and improving. This is attractive to others, especially to those of like minds.
I believe as it is shown in this book that the more we use our resources, our minds and talents, we do not wear them out, but we charge them and more thoughts and talents surface.
Jacques explains how to survive and have joy in a Nazis prison camp, I believe hat the truths he found there can help us live everyday. He said to survive in the camp one must not live for oneself alone. The self-centered never survived. And this I love and will close with, “Be engaged, no matter how, but be engaged.” Whatever you don in life do it well. Whatever you believe in live it well. Don’t live just for
First I want to open with the description Gordon B. Hinkley gave of this book,
“
“The world of violins and flutes, f horns and cello, of fugues, scherzos and gavottes, obeyed laws which, were so beautiful and so clear that all music seemed to speak of God. My body was not listening, it was praying. My spirit no longer had bounds, and if tears came to my eyes, I did not feel them running down because they were outside me. I wept with gratitude every time the orchestra began to sing. A world of sounds for a blind man, what sudden grace!”
D&C 25
“For a blind person music is nourishment, as beauty is for those who see. He needs to receive it, to have it administered at intervals like food. Otherwise a void is created inside him and causes him pain.”
We need to seek beauty and cleanliness.
“My God, give me the strength to keep my promises. Since I made them in a good cause, they are yours to keep as well as mine. Now that twenty young men – tomorrow there may be a hundred – are waiting for my orders, tell me what orders to give them. By myself I know how to do almost nothing, but if you will it I am capable of almost everything. Most of all give me prudence. Your enthusiasm I no longer need, for I am filled with it.”
Prayer to God as the Resistance started.
“An unaccustomed radiance filled my head, and my heart stopped beating out of rhythm. All at once I began to understand everything I had been seeking and not finding for the past weeks. As to my own conscience, it no longer troubled me. I had dedicated it to a cause which must have the power of truth since it was teaching me to speak all those words I had never uttered before.”
Scripture – good filled with light and bad cut off dark
If you want to be ordinary and nothing to shout about then sit on the fence. My choir teacher told us to not be timid as we would sing. If you are going to make a mistake, make it a good one, but sing with your heart and be confident. Great men and women pick a side of the fence and they are bold and courageous about their beliefs.
When two of the most courageous leaders of the French Resistance were asked what fault they found hardest to bear in other people. They both immediately answered, “Dullness.” Dullness and mediocrity is not what leaders are made of. One of them went on to say, “If some character says yes to me to be obliging and just to be let alone, I want to hit him.” Jacques Lusseyran, explained further, “Society was divided into two parts, the Hard and the Soft. It was not cowards one found among the soft ones, and certainly not traitors, for traitors were almost always the hard ones who had gone wrong, but the formless race of the procrastinators, and all the ones who approved of what we were doing and were careful not to be involved in it.”
Revelation 3:15-16 (KJV) says, “I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot. So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth. We need to chose now where we stand and we then need to stand for what we believe in courageously and boldly.
“Fear kills and joy maintains life.” Jacques hit a turning point in the Nazis prison camp. He began helping others and he said that was how he lived and survived.
Jacques said, “We had to live in the present; each moment had to absorbed for all that was in it, to satisfy the hunger for life. Take away from suffering its double drumbeat of resonance, memory and fear. Suffering may persist, but already it is relieved by half. When a ray of sunshine comes, open up; absorb it to the depths of your being. Never think that an hour earlier you were cold and that an hour later you will be cold again. Throw yourself into each moment as if it were the only one that really existed. Just enjoy.” Oh, that we could do this daily. That we could take a good thing and not diminish its goodness by remembering something bad.
This was not just a book about a man who played a key role in resisting the Nazis’ terrors and his imprisonment, but it is also a book about the life of a blind hero and a book about friendship. Jacques said, “Friendship was salvation, in this fragile world the only thing left that was not fragile. I promise you one can be drunk on friendship as well as on love.” I’m amazed at all the friends that Jacques found along his path in life. It is my belief that he was so gregarious because he lived with fervor and that people are attracted to this. He often was in the middle of things, organizing, helping, and living. He was constantly thinking, learning and improving. This is attractive to others, especially to those of like minds.
I believe as it is shown in this book that the more we use our resources, our minds and talents, we do not wear them out, but we charge them and more thoughts and talents surface.
Jacques explains how to survive and have joy in a Nazis prison camp, I believe hat the truths he found there can help us live everyday. He said to survive in the camp one must not live for oneself alone. The self-centered never survived. And this I love and will close with, “Be engaged, no matter how, but be engaged.” Whatever you don in life do it well. Whatever you believe in live it well. Don’t live just for
Monday, January 15, 2007
The Mother at Home (pages 35-40)
The Mother at Home – pages 35-40
1. “When you give a command, invariably enforce its obedience.”
2. “Mother’s word is to never be disregarded.”
3. Overlook when children are "thoughtless and inadvertent".
The mother is kind and does all she can to keep her children happy, but when a child disobeys or hesitates, the degree of the punishment may be judiciously considered. Disobedience is never tolerated and when it happens, the mother takes the opportunity to teach obedience with cutting “off its sources of enjoyment, or inflicting bodily pain”. (I find it interesting that the author gave two alternatives, inflicting pain and also “cut off its sources of enjoyment”) As this book states, a parent must decide the punishment; a strong reprimand may be sufficient. Regardless of the punishment, the mother must instill in the child’s mind that they will not get away with disobedience.
“There are doubtless cases of trifling faults occurring, which a wise parent will judge it expedient to overlook. Children will be thoughtless and inadvertent. They will occasionally err from strict propriety, without any real intention of doing wrong.” Judgment must be used to decide what is to be overlooked. But direct disobedience must not be viewed as a trifling thing.
God has given every mother the power to get obedience from children and to mold them to do what is right.
Once again, we must do this. This is our duty as mothers and we will suffer both in mind and spirit if we neglect to teach our children.
1. “When you give a command, invariably enforce its obedience.”
2. “Mother’s word is to never be disregarded.”
3. Overlook when children are "thoughtless and inadvertent".
The mother is kind and does all she can to keep her children happy, but when a child disobeys or hesitates, the degree of the punishment may be judiciously considered. Disobedience is never tolerated and when it happens, the mother takes the opportunity to teach obedience with cutting “off its sources of enjoyment, or inflicting bodily pain”. (I find it interesting that the author gave two alternatives, inflicting pain and also “cut off its sources of enjoyment”) As this book states, a parent must decide the punishment; a strong reprimand may be sufficient. Regardless of the punishment, the mother must instill in the child’s mind that they will not get away with disobedience.
“There are doubtless cases of trifling faults occurring, which a wise parent will judge it expedient to overlook. Children will be thoughtless and inadvertent. They will occasionally err from strict propriety, without any real intention of doing wrong.” Judgment must be used to decide what is to be overlooked. But direct disobedience must not be viewed as a trifling thing.
God has given every mother the power to get obedience from children and to mold them to do what is right.
Once again, we must do this. This is our duty as mothers and we will suffer both in mind and spirit if we neglect to teach our children.
Friday, January 12, 2007
Joseph, Husband to Mary
Bible Study - Matthew Chapter One
*We often hear of Mary’s character and humility as the “handmaid of the lord", but lets talk about the man who was worthy to be her husband.
I think we can learn a lot from the character of Joseph from the scriptures. When Joseph found out that his beloved fiancé was expecting a child I’m sure so many thoughts went through his head including confusion and deep hurt. According to law Joseph could have accused Mary of violating the marriage covenant and brought her to a public trial. Such a trial could have resulted in not only shame to Mary, but also a death sentence. He was not vengeful, but merciful even though he must have ached deeply. Instead of trying to hurt her like he assumed she had hurt him, he relieved her of the marriage contract quietly. See Mathew 1:19. He showed mercy. He showed love toward Mary. He showed compassion. He showed the very characteristics that Christ himself embodies. What a wonderful man Joseph must have been! He was the earthly father to our Savior and from these few bible verses we see why God entrusted him with such a sacred duty.
*We often hear of Mary’s character and humility as the “handmaid of the lord", but lets talk about the man who was worthy to be her husband.
I think we can learn a lot from the character of Joseph from the scriptures. When Joseph found out that his beloved fiancé was expecting a child I’m sure so many thoughts went through his head including confusion and deep hurt. According to law Joseph could have accused Mary of violating the marriage covenant and brought her to a public trial. Such a trial could have resulted in not only shame to Mary, but also a death sentence. He was not vengeful, but merciful even though he must have ached deeply. Instead of trying to hurt her like he assumed she had hurt him, he relieved her of the marriage contract quietly. See Mathew 1:19. He showed mercy. He showed love toward Mary. He showed compassion. He showed the very characteristics that Christ himself embodies. What a wonderful man Joseph must have been! He was the earthly father to our Savior and from these few bible verses we see why God entrusted him with such a sacred duty.
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
My Daily Routines
Morning Routine
• Get dressed
• Tidy house
• Fold Laundry
• Get Ready
• Daily Cleaning
Before Breakfast
• Everyone Dressed
• Clean Rooms
• 6yr get Cereal out/ 3yr get Milk
Nap Routine
• Tidy House / Laundry (15 Minutes)
• Scriptures
• Dinner Prep
• 3 To Do from my list
• ½ Hour me time
• Repeat
Night Routine (Before 9 PM)
• Tidy House
• Laundry
• Ready
• Hubby Time
• Next Day Schedule
• Prayer
• Read
• Get dressed
• Tidy house
• Fold Laundry
• Get Ready
• Daily Cleaning
Before Breakfast
• Everyone Dressed
• Clean Rooms
• 6yr get Cereal out/ 3yr get Milk
Nap Routine
• Tidy House / Laundry (15 Minutes)
• Scriptures
• Dinner Prep
• 3 To Do from my list
• ½ Hour me time
• Repeat
Night Routine (Before 9 PM)
• Tidy House
• Laundry
• Ready
• Hubby Time
• Next Day Schedule
• Prayer
• Read
Saturday, January 6, 2007
Memorization #3
I like to memorize different quotes and scriptures to keep my memory strong. This is the latest quote that is now a part of the files in my brain. (The punctuation may vary from the original since I just remember the words and not anything else.)
"The heights of great men reached and kept
Were not attained by sudden flight,
But they, while their companions slept,
Were toiling upward in the night."
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
"The heights of great men reached and kept
Were not attained by sudden flight,
But they, while their companions slept,
Were toiling upward in the night."
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Wednesday, January 3, 2007
The Mother at Home - Discussion
THE MOTHER AT HOME
Here are some things I took from the reading this week.
Children must learn obedience. This means obeying immediately, with a good attitude, without always understanding the reason. We must pray with our children, instruct in religious truths and love them.
The author explains a story of a child who does not want to take medicine. The child has been raised to obey only when it makes sense. The child doesn’t like the taste of the medicine so the child doesn’t think it makes sense to take the medicine. (This book was written before medicine tasted better than candy.) The mother of this story has raised her children to “call the shots” so the mother doesn’t force the medicine on the child and eventually the child dies. This is an extreme example – or is it?
Let’s first look at this physically or temporally. A young child is running toward the road. The parent yells, “Stop!” A child trained in obedience will stop immediately – even though he had previously looked to see there were not any cars in the road. A child who is trained to only obey when it makes sense may keep running. There were no cars so why not run into the road? The child recons he will go get the ball and then see what Father was yelling for. Unfortunately when the child first looked for cars, the car coming down the road was at an angle that the child could not see it.
Now let’s make the analogy go further to the spiritual realm. There are several things we, as parents have learned in our lives – some were learned the hard way. We will instruct our children against making our same mistakes. Our children may not see the reasoning, but if they will obey, they will avoid sadness. Every command does not need to be explained beforehand. God doesn’t explain all of his commandments with reason. There are some things we are simply asked to obey, for obedience sake. Some people do not pay tithing because they don’t see the reason. Some don’t want to wait to date until they are 16 because they don’t see the reasoning behind waiting. Some don’t want to go to the temple because they don’t see the point of it. Some don’t think the mother should stay home with the children because they feel it isn’t right for them. Regardless of whether or not a person thinks a commandment is full of reason, it is still a commandment and we ought to obey. Teaching children in the home to obey the parent, with or without reason, helps them to learn to obey God, with or without reason.
Here is the bottom line. Obeying God’s commandments – ALL OF THEM – will bring us greater joy and less heartache than if we do the opposite. We want this not only for ourselves, but especially for our children. To assist our children in being obedient to God, we must teach them to be obedient in the home. The home is where we learn to have a relationship with God so therefore, we must teach complete obedience in the home.
In The Mother at Home it states “It is certainly the duty of parents to convince their children of the reasonableness and propriety of their requirements. This should be done to instruct them, and to make them acquainted with moral obligation. But there should always be authority sufficient to enforce prompt obedience, whether the child can see the reason of the requirement or not.”
We are asked to follow commandments. Some of them we understand the reasoning. Some of them we do not understand until later when the wisdom is shown unto us. This is what we also need to teach in the home. Reasoning is good. It prepares the children to act for themselves and to make wise decisions, but often – too often – blind obedience is lost in modern pop psychology. Sometimes, we need to obey just for the sake of obeying.
When the early saints were given the Word of Wisdom, it didn’t make sense to them. But through obedience and time, we are all seeing the wisdom of such a commandment.
How do you teach obedience? Well, we will all have to wait to find out. The next portion of the book deals with this.
Here are some things I took from the reading this week.
Children must learn obedience. This means obeying immediately, with a good attitude, without always understanding the reason. We must pray with our children, instruct in religious truths and love them.
The author explains a story of a child who does not want to take medicine. The child has been raised to obey only when it makes sense. The child doesn’t like the taste of the medicine so the child doesn’t think it makes sense to take the medicine. (This book was written before medicine tasted better than candy.) The mother of this story has raised her children to “call the shots” so the mother doesn’t force the medicine on the child and eventually the child dies. This is an extreme example – or is it?
Let’s first look at this physically or temporally. A young child is running toward the road. The parent yells, “Stop!” A child trained in obedience will stop immediately – even though he had previously looked to see there were not any cars in the road. A child who is trained to only obey when it makes sense may keep running. There were no cars so why not run into the road? The child recons he will go get the ball and then see what Father was yelling for. Unfortunately when the child first looked for cars, the car coming down the road was at an angle that the child could not see it.
Now let’s make the analogy go further to the spiritual realm. There are several things we, as parents have learned in our lives – some were learned the hard way. We will instruct our children against making our same mistakes. Our children may not see the reasoning, but if they will obey, they will avoid sadness. Every command does not need to be explained beforehand. God doesn’t explain all of his commandments with reason. There are some things we are simply asked to obey, for obedience sake. Some people do not pay tithing because they don’t see the reason. Some don’t want to wait to date until they are 16 because they don’t see the reasoning behind waiting. Some don’t want to go to the temple because they don’t see the point of it. Some don’t think the mother should stay home with the children because they feel it isn’t right for them. Regardless of whether or not a person thinks a commandment is full of reason, it is still a commandment and we ought to obey. Teaching children in the home to obey the parent, with or without reason, helps them to learn to obey God, with or without reason.
Here is the bottom line. Obeying God’s commandments – ALL OF THEM – will bring us greater joy and less heartache than if we do the opposite. We want this not only for ourselves, but especially for our children. To assist our children in being obedient to God, we must teach them to be obedient in the home. The home is where we learn to have a relationship with God so therefore, we must teach complete obedience in the home.
In The Mother at Home it states “It is certainly the duty of parents to convince their children of the reasonableness and propriety of their requirements. This should be done to instruct them, and to make them acquainted with moral obligation. But there should always be authority sufficient to enforce prompt obedience, whether the child can see the reason of the requirement or not.”
We are asked to follow commandments. Some of them we understand the reasoning. Some of them we do not understand until later when the wisdom is shown unto us. This is what we also need to teach in the home. Reasoning is good. It prepares the children to act for themselves and to make wise decisions, but often – too often – blind obedience is lost in modern pop psychology. Sometimes, we need to obey just for the sake of obeying.
When the early saints were given the Word of Wisdom, it didn’t make sense to them. But through obedience and time, we are all seeing the wisdom of such a commandment.
How do you teach obedience? Well, we will all have to wait to find out. The next portion of the book deals with this.
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